Sunday, February 26, 2012

Soar My Angel


My love, soul mate and best friend.

Earned his angel wings on January 26th, 2012.

It’s been exactly one month since Sean looked me straight in the eye and said, “I love you” for the last time.

It’s been one long month since I felt him run his fingers through my hair, clutch my hand, laugh heartily at my stupidly funny jokes and embrace me tightly. 

It’s also been one month  that I’ve been unable to step into the kitchen, knowing that my biggest culinary fan and critic and favourite dining companion won’t be savouring anything I cook for the rest of my life.

Tears. Pain. Loss. These words may now be regularly associated with us and our families, but if there is one life lesson that I’ve learned from the love of my life is never to give the situation power. To always make an informed choice based on your wants and not on what is expected by others. And most of all, to smile through every kind of adversity that you’re faced with.

If you knew Sean, you would agree that living life on his terms was a philosophy he lived to the fullest. Today on his one month anniversary, I can safely say that there isn’t a single moment in his 32 years on earth that he regretted. So now when I’m faced with a decision, I always wonder, “What would Sean have done?” An answer usually becomes crystal clear very quickly. I like to think a certain handsome five-foot eleven inch Guardian Angel is speeding along the thought process.

So this decision wasn’t an easy one for me to make. With my main inspiration for Potato Chops and Boneless Chicken having assumed a new role in his eternal life, I’ve decided to put the blog to bed. It was a fantastic, educational journey for us both and we enjoyed sharing it with everyone. Potato Chops and Boneless Chicken will continue to live in memory of Sean, his voracious appetite and his innate ability to enjoy every meal that was put in front of him – no matter how strange or questionable.

I miss my dining partner, sous chef, chief taster and reviewer.

But I know when I step into the kitchen again, Sean will be by my side making sure I'm not going to cut or burn my clumsy self. And as always, he’ll be sitting at the head of our dining table smiling and praying that I’ve added enough salt to my dinner.

Sweet dreams my angel. May your new heavenly companions enjoy every second around the dining table with you. Don't miss me too much. Bon appétit! 


  1. Bev,

    I have an email in draft just sitting there. Because I don't know the right thing to say. I am so sorry for your loss and this post brought tears to my eyes. So eloquent, even in the face of what you've been through.

    My heart is breaking for you but I know that your "what would Sean do" mantra will serve you well for the next stage in your life. Whilst I will miss your musings on this blog, I totally understand. It seems like the right thing to do.

    I'm off to send that email now. Sending you much love and many hugs.


  2. Beverley,

    I wont lie, I struggled to finish reading this last installment of Potato Chops and Boneless Chicken. I always viewed iyour blog as a testament to your love and your hope for Sean. I will miss reading PC & BC. I believe though that Sean would never want you to stop writing your food chronicles so I am hopeful that there will a new food blog, that when you are ready to begin, will emerge.

    There are no words that I can write that could possibly take away any of this ache that you are living with. Just remember there was a reason that Sean loved you as he did and it the same reason that the rest of us here feel the way we do about you. When you have those days when you think you just can't stand it anymore, lean on us.

    Thank you for sharing so much with us.

    Much love and respect,

  3. Dear Beverley

    This is beautiful, thank you for sharing.

    You have reminded many I am quite sure, of just how fragile and precious life is.
    Just when one gets caught up in the trivial day to day drama's an event like this, puts it all back into perspective. How wonderful though, that Sean lived a life, filled with so much love.

    Strength, and healing is what I wish for you.


  4. "Not by lamentations and mournful chants ought we to celebrate the funeral of a good man, but by joyful songs, for in ceasing to be numbered among mortals he enters upon the heritage of a diviner life." - Plutarch
    For those that are loved, they will be remembered with fondness. And for every path they have trod, a flower or two will come to blossom. Birds will sing. Butterflies will dance. Our loved ones will always be blessed with peace, love and wonder.

  5. Dear Bev,

    My eyes are misty reading your last post. I owe to you and Sean the success of my chocolate cake which my daughter absolutly loved(Ingrid's chocolate cakes). I have a file of your receipes which i will try out. I sincerely beleive that by doing this I am making you and Sean who is in heaven happy. You and Sean will forever remain in my heart.

    You and Sean have made me an even more optimistic person who has made me face life as it comes.

    Thank you Bev. Sean truly loved you and will continue to love you and bless you to move on with your life.

  6. Hey Pumpkin

    You made me appreciate food more... Today i made one of your breakfast recipe, scramble eggs on toast.. I have stuck the recipe on my fridge.. Even my husband really enjoys it.

    I will still continue making dishes from ur blog.. I still have to try the tiramisu and chocolate cake.. - one day!!


  7. Dearest Bev,
    Such a moving and beautiful piece. Rightly said, Sean taught us how to smile in the face of adversity.......
    i have nothing but the fondest memories of you both, he will be missed very dearly. Sending you a big warm hug ! xx

  8. Dear Bev

    I have always enjoyed reading your blog. Sean's and your passion for food stood out in your chronicles. I second an earlier comment that Sean would not want you to stop writing about food. I wish you strength; I know Sean will be by your side at every step of the way.



  9. Hai Bev,

    I made the chocolate cake yesterday and had a blast. Will be making more. Going to try out the Vanilla lime flan, those brownies and eggs on toast. I love to cook and owe it to you. Thanks to you, i enter the kitchen with confidence that whatever i make will come out fine and thats exactly how its been going on.

    Also found a way to my husbands heart. its through the stomach. Thank you Bev and Sean may you rsst in peace and guide Bev through

  10. a very beautiful reminder of life ...brought tears to my eyes..its beautiful bev...your blogs always teach me a new lesson...dont know what else to say but will always pray for your you gurl!

  11. My thoughts and prayers are with you. May God bless Sean's soul and give you the strength you need.

    Take care and stay blessed xx

  12. Beverley,

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and Sean. I learnt really late. Hope you find the strength and move ahead in your life. My best wishes are with you.

    God bless you!

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